The Last Temptation of Yva.

By | April 15, 2009

So most RP’ers have FlagRSP or Immersion installed.  These are mighty tools.  One might say they’re a keystone to Warcraft roleplay.  Problem is, there are so many bad descriptions out there you can drown in obsurdity.  We’ve all seen Those RSPs but just in case you’ve missed ‘em recently?

Lord Mograine Needs A Short Right Hand Woman

Lord Mograine Needs A Short Right Hand Woman

The reason I chose this particular flavor of bad was the use of a major character.  On my own server, I’ve seen Rivendares, Tyrande’s sisters, Illidan’s consorts, Malfurion’s long lost sons, and Aspect’s Offspring parading around.  It’s high time I admit it.

I’m intrigued.

I want a character like that.  I want to break lore and common sense.  I WANT THIS SHINY STUFF FOR MYSELF.  So I challenged myself to write an RSP for an imaginary character.  I wanted to give it a shot.  Let’s see how I do.

MarieSue is voluptous and curvy, standing at an austere six feet in height.  She has skin as pale as milk and hair darker than a raven’s wing.  Your eyes cannot seem to leave her, as her movements are as graceful as a dancer and her beauty is breathtaking.  Men are especially drawn to her as the air grows heavy when she lifts her hand.  Is that desire?  Is that power?  Who knows, but you want her.  You can’t help yourself.

Around her neck, Marie has a collar with an emerald studded clasp.  The clasp has an ornate “A” etched into it.  There are also matching metal cuffs around her wrists.  Each piece has a loop that looks like a chain would fit through, as if this woman’s been a prisoner.

When Marie speaks it’s with the voice of a thousand winds.  Her voice cracks when she talks of her time in Arthas’s Citadel as his chosen companion.  Her great green eyes (no wait, are they blue?  It’s hard to tell sometimes) tear up as she speaks of him, and it’s evident there’s something there she dares not admit to.  Her hand strays to a pouch at her waist, and sometimes, you’d swear that pouch is /beating like a heart/.

Her motto is “Mine forever, His tomorrow.”  When she says it, sadness laces her words. 

You Want Her.  NO REALLY YOU DO.


So dear readers, if you were to have a bit of fun, which major lore character would you entwine yourself with and why?  Furthermore, what kind of RSP do you think you could come up with?  I challenge you to taste the forbidden fruit of RP Faux Pas.



Itanya Blade on April 15, 2009 at 2:08 pm.

You scare me!


Tirith on April 16, 2009 at 4:12 pm.

I’ve actually managed without RSP more often than not lately; my limited experiment suggested that it might contribute to Dalaran-booting due to channelspam, and (in part because of abominations unto lore, writing, and common decency like these) just didn’t consider it worth the effort to troubleshoot. This would probably be a bigger deal if I had been making a more serious effort at roleplaying characters other than Tirith, but my inability to see character descriptions just makes it all the easier to portray his general disinterest in other people. For the few situations where visual information has been necessary to his reaction, it’s either revealed in emote or OOC.

But maybe it hasn’t ALWAYS been, and I’m laboring under the delusion that my RSPlessness isn’t the crippling lack it actually is.

Jezrael on May 1, 2009 at 3:01 am.

I installed RPS and ran around with it for a while. I’m afraid I got put off by a) the general amount of awful I saw and b) it created more lag in the game for me.

I certainly learned by example just how bad character descriptions can be. It made me nervous about writing my own and falling into the same traps.