Fleshing Out Your Character: Insecurities

When you’re creating a character, it’s often easy to think about the traits that make him cool to hang out with, or to figure out what abilities she prides herself on.  But what about the things that make her feel self-conscious or insecure?  What does your character dread will get pointed out about him?

These can be anything from minor flaws to major failings.  They might stem from physical characteristics (or the character’s perception thereof) or be a result of something in her backstory. Let’s take a look at a few examples.  I’m grouping them into physical/mental/social, though understand that in a lot of ways, these categories might bleed into one another.

Physical

Something about your character’s body is the source of insecurity.  Is she taller than everyone she knows?  Does he have an awkward gait due to an injury?  Are his clothes shabby and worn?  Is she a Night Elf who thinks her ears are way too short?

Mental

We have two characters in the Riders who can’t read, a fact that made them very uncomfortable when attention was drawn to it, even inadvertently.  Maybe your character’s terrible at math and dreads a shopkeeper figuring that out and taking advantage of them.  Perhaps their memory is missing from a certain period of time, and they don’t want anyone to know.

Social

Is your character afraid her commoner’s accent will make people think less of her?  Is he terrified of having to speak in front of a crowd?  Maybe he never really had any close friends and suddenly has someone confiding in him — how will he react to someone crying on his shoulder?  What if your character failed spectacularly at something in the past, and is afraid she’ll be recognized and ridiculed for it?

Once you have some of ideas for insecurities in mind, it’s worthwhile to explore why they’re there in the first place.  Did the tall girl in the class get teased about her height when she was growing up, or taunted because her dresses always hung awkwardly on her gangly frame?  Did the character’s failure at math mean their brother got cheated out of a deal?  Did he grow up somewhere remote, with only his immediate family for company?

The reasoning doesn’t have to be intricate.  It doesn’t even have to make sense.  A real-life example: I hate showing my teeth when I smile.  Before braces, I had a huge overbite.  The braces have been off for fifteen years and I still have A Thing about it.  Last weekend, Yva asked me to show ‘em, and I literally could not do it. To the point where I spent the next ten minutes covering my mouth with my hand.

Does it make sense?  Not at all.  But there it is.

So how did your character’s insecurities pop up in the first place?  And how do they color his or her actions and reactions in-game?

Does the shabbily dressed character steal finery from nobles’ clotheslines on wash day?  Does the one who stutters speak as rarely as possible?

Do they perhaps try to cover up their insecurities in another way?  The short-eared elf might go out and get a hundred piercings so peoples’ eyes are drawn to the jewelry rather than the size and shape of her ears.  The woman with the commoner’s accent might adopt a noble’s cadence and inflection to hide where she’s truly from.

How does that character react when someone does call attention to their insecurities?  Do they shrink away or flee the scene?  Do they put on some false bravado and talk too loudly?  Do they try deflecting and changing the subject?

Physical flaws are probably among the easiest to create and bring into roleplay, though there’s the danger of coming off as a bit Sue-ish with them.  If your character is constantly lamenting how ugly she is while her RSP description lists all the ways in which she’s a perfect sparkleprincess, it becomes less about insecurity and more about fishing for attention.  This isn’t to say that all of a character’s perceived physical flaws have to be real.  Body dysmorphic disorder is a very real thing (and would be a completely different post), but if a character’s only calling attention to her “too-big nose” so someone will tell her how it’s really quite lovely and dainty and how they just want to kiss it, well… maybe you want to rethink that.

Something else to consider is whether or not you want your character to overcome that insecurity.  It can become a great source for a storyline.  You can go for anything from the comic to the tragic:  the guy who hates public speaking tries out for a play and hijinks ensue.  The person who doesn’t really know how to be close to someone else fails to deliver comfort in a friend’s time of need — not because he doesn’t feel sympathy, but because he doesn’t know how to show it.  Maybe he loses the friend altogether; maybe he has to work to repair the friendship.  Maybe the spurned friend sells him out to the villain.

So, cats ‘n’ kittens, let’s hear it!  What are some of your characters’ insecurities?  How did they start?  What happens when attention is called to them?  Do you think they’ll ever overcome it, either as a part of their story arc, or simply through interactions with others?

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